Yes, Virginia, There is a Miniature Giraffe.

It was at least six years ago…

It was one of those dreams that you wake up wishing you could return to…and that you remember for the rest of your life.

I dreamed that I had a miniature Giraffe.

He came up to my knees.  And he was perfectly adorable.

We kept him on our back porch, but he was also house trained.  In fact, he was good at going up the stairs, but tended to topple head-and-neck-over-heels when trying to go downstairs.

(Giraffes are not, after all, built like mountain goats.)

Also – it was very important in the dream that he was called a “min-EYE-a-ture Giraffe” – not a “min-ee-a-ture Giraffe”.

Since that wonderful night, I’ve always wanted that min-EYE-a-ture Giraffe for real – after all, Giraffes are one of my favorite animals – I‘ve even been known to let them wrap their tongue around me.

Giraffe

Fast forward to this year’s Super Bowl Commercialathon.

There was a DirectTV commercial, featuring none other than….

 

A miniature giraffe.

Did you see him??

Was he not as perfectly adorably cute as he was in my dream?

Oh yeah.. you didn’t see my dream.  But trust me – he is.  They totally stole him DIRECTLY out of my dream.

When I saw the commercial for the first time, I gleefully pointed him out to Chris (who also remembered my dream, since I talked about nothing else but wanting a min-EYE-a-ture Giraffe for weeks afterward), but immediately wrote it off as a camera trick.

Until yesterday.

When, thanks to my friends Kristen and Daniel on Twitter, I discovered the Russian secret that is Sokoblovsky Farms: The breeder of the As Seen On TV PETITE LAP GIRAFFES!!!

LapGiraffe

Yes, the actually exist!!!

77625252

And their web site is fabulous…

You can watch the what the giraffes are doing RIGHT NOW on their live web cam!!

And read the charmingly bad English description of how they created them!!

AND..

AND…

AND!!!

YOU CAN EVEN SIGN UP ON THE WAITING LIST TO GET YOUR VERY OWN LAP GIRAFFE!!

Obviously, I clicked the “I WANT GIRAFFE clicking here” button as quickly as I could, and the following message immediately popped up:

“Congratulations!!! You make 6651 on waiting list for petite lap giraffe. You can expect giraffe in fall 11238! Then you will be most happy. Share greatest news with family on the facebook or tweeter.”

Oh yes! Year 11,238! It will be a perfect present for my…uh…great-great-great-great…grand…child…to the 238th power…

And at that point I realized that Sokoblovsky never asked for my name to hold my waiting list spot…

…and I called the 1-800 number at the bottom of the site to hear a recording of a thick, fake Russian accent tell me about the Lap Giraffes…

And, just like the crushing moment that I realized that Santa Claus wasn’t real, my dreams of there really being min-EYE-a-ture Giraffes in the world vanished in a pit of disappointing despair.

I realized that Sokoblovsky Farms was completely fabricated, and was just a stinkin’ BRILLIANT addition to DirecTV’s marketing campaign.

But for just a minute, they’d convinced me that my dreams had come true – quite literally.  But the resulting despondency was totally worth the exhilaration of believing – even if for a moment.

And even if I did win myself the title of “Sucker of the Year”.

Leave your comment below!

Comments

  1. 1
    Amy Nabors says:

    Ok that would be so cool but someone has way too much time on their hands to.come up with that elaborate of a joke.

    • 1.1
      dale says:

      Really, we did walk on the moon! You can really walk on a mixture of cornstarch and water. For the right amount of money who knows what is possible!

      • Lissa says:

        Actually, you can walk on water and cornstarch. Mixing them together makes what is known as a non-neutonian fluid, which acts like a solid under pressure, but like a liquid in a normal state. Didn’t your mom ever make Gack with you? That stuff is so much fun to play with!

  2. 2
    Robin says:

    Well, now if you start getting spam calls from Direct TV, you will know where they got their information. LOL Great!

  3. 3
    @LaureeAshcom says:

    no making fun here…. sometimes you need to grab even the illusion that your dream may come true….. didn’t it make your heart beat lighter and faster????

    i am proud of you.

    • 3.1
      Rachel says:

      I appreciate your belief in me! And my dreams! And my gullibility!!

      • Being an animal lover from early childhood, I must investigate the existance of any new pet on the market. I think the possiblity is interesting but I do not think my husband will let me have another pet. I have a dog, two cat(had 4- 2 recently died of old age diseases). 10 turtles and 4 sugar gliders. I feed about a dozen raccoons and one stray cat every night. I feed a coulpe dozen squirls and 6 deer, daily. You can see my husbands reason for concern. Totally justified.

        • Carlee says:

          My grandpa had a deer that would come up to his door (it was one that the top half opened) and he would feed it apples.

  4. 4
    Michele says:

    I fell in love with that tiny giraffe the first time I saw him! He kisses!

  5. 5

    I was just as disappointed to find out it was a ruse as you were! I was hoping you’d finally get your min-EYE-a-ture Giraffe! ;-)

  6. 6

    Hey! It’s kind of like Uncle Joe’s Tot Locker :)

  7. 7
    Kristen says:

    Thanks for the shout-out. My dreams, too, were shattered.

    Great marketing at work. The same firm that did the commercial also did the website.

  8. 8

    Ok, I DO feel less stupid that I’m not the only one. Kinda sad. But mostly stupid.

  9. 9
    Marty says:

    Awwwwwwwwwww….. those are just the cutest little things ever! I would be all for getting one as well :-)

  10. 10
    Angela says:

    OMG I almost had a heart attack! I did not have a dream about a miniature giraffe like you did, but I have always loved giraffes and elephants (hello, Alabama – Roll Tide!). When I saw the first commercial with the miniature giraffe I immediately screamed “I want one!”. I thought for a moment there they actually existed when I read your post. Yes, I am that gullable. Oh well, we can always dream. They did figure out a way to make munchkin cats, maybe someone will make it their mission to breed miniature giraffes! Thanks for the laugh!

    • 10.1
      Rachel says:

      Ooh!!! What if there was a miniature lap elephant?? Then maybe we’d finally get that Real Elephant Mascot that Alabama so deserves!!!!

  11. 11
    Kate says:

    That is one AMAZING dream!

  12. 12
    Eleanorjane says:

    I love giraffes too – in fact I pretty much love all herbivours. I’d like a small farm with donkeys, alpacas, angora goats…

    I wouldn’t have been taken in by the baby giraffe ‘cos it looks quite similar to this:

    http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_KLejmKaJ1t0/S9CyiKK_9sI/AAAAAAAAACY/NRKB2Qds23M/s1600/mini-dragon.jpg

  13. 13
    becca says:

    but they’re just SO cute; how could they not be real? haha! yes, that site is brilliant and for a split second, i was about to buy into it. bummer. maybe one day?

  14. 14
    Nicki says:

    We love those commercials and watch them just for the miniature giraffe! :D

  15. 15
    Rachel says:

    Okay, well I am on the same page b/c I had never heard of them but as I was reading this I was like, “Really?? Wow.” but then I got to the end. So my dream of about 4.5 seconds was shattered as well. :) You never know though, they can come up with anything these days!

  16. 16
    Giraffe lover! says:

    I’m glad to know that I’m not the only one who made this same mistake. i was SOOOO excited! =(

  17. 17
    Vlad says:

    Sadly, I too was taken in. I saw the site yesterday and while meeting with friends later that day, said they were the real deal. Today I went back to the site and saw the live camera feed. Then I opened a different browser and went to the same URL, and the pictures were different. The time stamp was exactly the same, however Vladimir appears on the right hand panel, yet absent in the left hand part of the screen capture. Also there is a lot of sunlight on the right and not so much on the left. I should have known yesterday when it said the diet was distilled water and bonsai leaves. Click on this link to see the two browser screens. I’d say this was a great promotion, except no one is tied to it. https://docs.google.com/leaf?id=0B1KLC-TsB6kBZjc4ZjY0MGQtODMzZC00ZDU4LTkwZmYtYmNjYTZlN2FlYTI2&hl=en&authkey=CI71xcEB

  18. 18
    Heather says:

    I fell for it too. :(

    Giraffes are my absolute favourite animal, and I clicked the waiting list thing before I even checked google to see if it was a scam. I hadn’t seen the superbowl commercial until my husband showed me later. I was soooo excited until I saw the number on the waiting list I was. Then everything started to sink in. I literally was crushed. Lol.

    But someday, someday we’ll get our giraffes. I refuse to give up.

  19. 19
    Lisa says:

    They got me too! I called my mother (who laughed at me) and everything. My mother loves giraffes so for a brief moment I envisioned her sitting around the house with one in her lap lol. Oh well, at least I’m a loving daughter even if a little gullible. :)

  20. 20
    Marsha says:

    In seeing the commercial, I wasn’t sure about these mini giraffes, although I was hopeful. I searched online to see what I could find. When I found the “live” video feed, I was sooo excited… then I realized that it was about 4:00am EST which means it should have been about 11:00am in Russia and it was completely dark outside in the “live” feed. They’ve done a good job in putting this together to make us wonder, but left a few loop holes so our dreams could be crushed :(
    Thank you for taking the time to put this write up together!

  21. 21
    Rico says:

    Hello everyone, I came to say that I placed an order for my petite lap giraffe some time ago, and I was told i was number 24. Now I got a call and was told my giraffe is next, I put downpayment for $5000.00 american dollars (I live in Mexico), they ask for S.S # and Credit Card but in Mexico we don’t have S.S# so I sent my Credit Card information. I was told next month I can go to Russia to pick my very own petite lap giraffe. Im very excited. This is true

  22. 22
    jarid miller says:

    it is not real!!! look at 4 of the webcasts at one time. the animal will be in the door way in one but not in the rest. i was watching the webcast and i saw, in one video that it was in the door way and on a nother tab watching the same video he was walking infront of the camra just out side!!! and look at the grass whan it walkes. it does not move at all.. if it was real it would move the grass when it walked….. so don’t beleve everything you see.

  23. 23
    Sharon says:

    That is fabulous!!! I want one too! Love the webcam…keep hoping and maybe someday……..

  24. 24
    Sharon says:

    O.K. I should have read your other posts – but people really? A live miniature giraffe? Research, people, please before you are foolish enough to give out your credit card information. it’s funny, charming, adorable but NOT REAL!!

  25. 25
    mercedes says:

    It might can happen there are small ppl dogs ect….u can make or create anything in a lab…or maybe look in the jungle I’m sure its one out there

  26. 26
    jenelle says:

    Bwwwaahahahahah best thing i read in a long time! You are an excellent writer!

  27. 27
    Brad says:

    Yea, think about that live feed cam, if its 9:30 am here, its still dark outside there. And it appears as though the cam is in some sort of barn…. Awesome, but fake.

  28. 28
    Christell Lewis says:

    This was actually a topic of dinner conversation last night…. My daughter said it HAD to be real because she saw it on TV and the internet..I am so sorry to have to tell her that it’s not. I didn’t think it was, but thought I would do some research anyway…thanks for your help!

  29. 29
    Carlee says:

    If you watch the ‘live’ cam and you click refresh enough (incase of lag) it will take you to a different camera, (there is one in each room and one outside facing the rooms) you will see the same ‘live’ shot you have before. I saw the same one at least three times. Though at night it may be live because you can watch the giraffe sleep and at one point one woke up and looked at the camera. Check it out at night.

    • 29.1
      Roxie says:

      I am also one of thoughs gullable people. I was already thinking of how much it would cost to fly to Russia to see them in person!!! Oh Well. People can take away alot of things but they can’t take away our dreams.

  30. 30
    Emily says:

    Ahhhh I almost fell for it too!!! I love giraffes more than anything. Ha ha. such a clever idea. I wish it were true!

  31. 31
    aleks yatskevich says:

    OMG I just had this dream too! And I haven’t seen that commercial for ages! I dreamed I saw it in my house, and I saw it in the corner of my eye, but when id go after it, it woud dissapear or hide somewhere! After some time I finally caught it, showed my mother, we had it for some time, then people came to investigate it, learn about it. Pretty soon after everyone got their hands on it, it died…and everyone was bawling. My dream ended with an image of the future, in some jungle, where explorers were in search of this giraffe one last time.

  32. 32
    David says:

    This broke my heart. After someone posted the Sokoblovsky Farms website on facebook, I too thought maybe they were real. When I was younger, I thought it would be neat to breed miniature versions of larger animals, such as miniature versions of big cats. Maybe someday.

  33. 33
    Jui says:

    Sigh! I read your entire blog and still went to sign up for a lap giraffe. sigh :(
    inspite of the amazingly bad english and fake giraffe-cam, i still keep wishing it was true..

  34. 34
    Taylor says:

    Do you not realize some people still believe in Santa Claus and especially a little kid. So if they were to read this this would mess up their dreams.

  35. 35
    Brandon says:

    Ok, what threw me off was Ripley’s Believe it or Not states on their website that they are infact real.. so wtf?!
    http://www.ripleys.com/weird/daily-dose-of-weird-wtf-blog/crazy-animals/amazing-miniature-lap-giraffes/

  36. 36
    Brandon says:

    Ok, so upon further inspection on the Ripley’s site, *ahem* it was posted on April 1st of 2011… way to troll Ripley’s

  37. 37
    Sam says:

    How long do they live?

  38. 38
    uno says:

    science really needs to get on this and miniature tigers.

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