Alabama Fashion Report: 2012.

You might have noticed that Alabama has won a lot of football games over the past few years.

In fact, as of last Saturday night, they will, yet again, be in the National Championship.

From what I’ve heard, there are some people, somewhere out there (cue Fievel), that do not like this development.  Some people that grow tired of Alabama playing in this game, time after time (cue Cyndi).

And that’s okay.

As a football wife, I understand “tired.”

But I’m sure that those people are none of you.

So with that in mind, I am here, with the plethora of photos I took at Alabama Games this year, to help you prepare your wardrobe for January the seventh, on which date I am confident that you will be cheering for my husband’s* beloved team.

And you won’t be in bad company – many, many new fans have joined the Tide Ranks during this new era of winning.

Hello Kitty, for one, is now an Alabama fan.

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Also?  God.

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…Because it’s not at all presumptive, disturbing, and otherwise completely sacrilegious to screenprint a HOUNDSTOOTH CROSS.

Mickey and Minnie have come around to the ways of the Elephant,

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As well as Taiwanese Farmers that happen to reside in Alabama.

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So now that we’ve established the prevalence and therefore legitimacy of your newly appointed fandom, here are some options for you.

Accessories are the building blocks of your outfit.

So let’s start with a purse.  Houndstooth flowers are the perfect way to show your blooming team spirit.  For appropriate proportions, your flower should be approximately 78% of the size of your head.

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This should not be hard to measure, because it is a completely foregone assumption that you will have a hat.  A Houndstooth Hat.  A Bedazzled Houndstooth Hat.

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Your other option is a nice crochet, also available in – you guessed it, houndstooth.

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And of course your children will need proper BBTTH’s**.

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Boots are expected.

You can go with the 2012 Standard Issue Sorority Girl Boot,

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But the Standard Issue changes quite frequently, and as such will only last you for one season.

(For example, note the 2010 Standard Issue Sorority Girl Boot.)

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So instead, I recommend that you choose something more classic.  More timeless.  More loyal to your team.

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If you don’t wear boots, the consequences are grave.

You will be tied down, blindfolded, gagged, and involuntarily issued a real Alabama Tattoo.

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So we’ve got your accessories covered.  Let’s move onto pants.

Which, as opposed to your accessories, are completely optional.

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But if you do choose to wear pants, definitely go with something printed or embroidered.

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And never forget: the more rotating team symbols you can get embroidered onto your butt, the more expensive it looks.

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When it comes to shirts and dresses, you should always strive to match your friends.

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Because there’s nothing that shows team solidarity than grown women in identical clothing.

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It’s guaranteed to make the players play better.

Really.

Let’s move on to prints.

Houndstooth, of course, is the standard print.

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But your loyalty can’t be really proven unless you pair your Houndstooth with Houndstooth.

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If you want to be different, try Chevron (the New Houndstooth),

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Othello,

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Bucket,

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Or Spandex.  Because when worn tight enough, it’s absolutely a print.

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No outfit is complete without the proper vehicle.

One hot item is a motorized, custom-painted Alabama Tricycle.  Best when paired with a Crimson Roll-Hawk atop your head.

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If you don’t have enough room in your fancy Alabama car for your friends, you can always add on.

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And of course you can’t go wrong with classics,

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Slightly newer classics,

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classic wannabes,

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or motorized football helmets.

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Clown Cars, when painted well, will also compliment your outfit nicely.

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If you have a pet, you will need to be prepared to increase your accessories budget.

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As well as your tattoo budget.

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But if all of your wardrobe intentions fail, then by all means just show up in your Snuggie and you’ll be fine.

 

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* My husband is not Nick Saban.  Nor is he AJ McCarron or Mal Moore or Bear Bryant.  But those facts do not get in the way of his passionate ownership of his team.

** Bows Bigger Than Their Heads.

Leave your comment below!

Comments

  1. 1
    MamaHen says:

    Oh, I love our state! I have to say the classic truck is pretty impressive. Well done, Alabama, well done.

  2. 2
    Ann Marie says:

    Ah, how I love this yearly fashion report! :)
    Oh, the ridiculousness we live in this state!
    Anyway, suffice to say, I am glad the Standard Issue Boot has moved on from the Uggs…at least the Sorority Uniform is *slightly* more flattering with the pretty brown leather boots, depending of course if they are paired with a pretty outfit, rather than the going-to-class Uniform of leggings and a tee/cardi combo…
    But I actually really love that girl’s chevron dress…super cute and doesn’t scream “Roll Tide” if not being worn at a football game!
    Nicely done Rach, as per usual! :)

    • 2.1
      Rachel says:

      Agreed!! I am loving this year’s Riding Boot – I might have bought my own pair after studying sorority feet for a few weeks. I also love the Chevron – I think it’s a great substitution for overused houndstooth.

  3. 3
    Kitty Engle says:

    There are many amazing things we do in our state and football is number one.

  4. 4
    Amy says:

    Excuse me while I vomit…All that houndstooth in one place is definitely gag worthy, said from a loyal-to-the-end Auburn fan!

  5. 5
    Marie says:

    Roll Tide! True fans through the lean years are now enjoying this season of winning. All I know is I make sure the kid is wearing an AL shirt of some kind or other on game day and the Tide keeps winning. It’s only weird if it doesn’t work. ;-p

  6. 6
    Laura W. says:

    My favorite part of this post: “Or Spandex.  Because when worn tight enough, it’s absolutely a print.”

    Wow.

    Despite it all, ROLL TIDE!!!

  7. 7
    Rachel says:

    I love this yearly post! It always makes me laugh and I continue to be amazed at this level of football fan-ship! You guys sure do love your college football!

  8. 8
    LoraLynn says:

    The spandex line is my favorite. Nice one. :-)

  9. 9
    Jennifer M. says:

    First of all, you completely forgot the requisite sorority girl running shorts with the boots. Perhaps it was too cold?

    And then first of all (sorry, longstanding joke with myself!), I have that chevron dress. That EXACT chevron dress. OKay, maybe not the same exact one the girl possesses, as mine is presently in my closet — here in Maine. And I do think it looks better on me, though (as in, it actually FITS me). And in my defense, I don’t wear it with houndstooth anything. Does that get me a pass?

    (okay, okay, but I totally rocked a houndstooth scarf up here today, thankyouverymuch!)

    • 9.1
      Rachel says:

      Yes, I actually love the Chevron – it’s a breath of fresh air in a Houndstooth Fog. Although most of my post was tongue-in-cheek, there were a few things amidst it all that I actually love. That way, I have complete and utter deniability. Brilliant, don’t you think?

  10. 10
    Holly says:

    Wow. Just…wow.

  11. 11
    Angela in Arizona says:

    Can I tell you how excited I was when I saw Alabama made it to the Championships because I KNEW that finally, after much waiting and gnashing of teeth, I would get to see the Roll Tide Fashion Guide. Ahhh. My fall is now complete.

    • 11.1
      Rachel says:

      You’re so funny. It’s been sitting in my drafts all season, but I just didn’t have the inspiration for it. I’m glad you were happy to see it!

  12. 12
    Katie says:

    Some of that I would wear. Some of that I would pose for a picture next to it. And some of it makes me question the lens on your camera because there is no way you got close enough for a good picture without laughing and giving away why you were taking the picture. When your kids are grown and you are free to travel with Chris (after he retires) you should totally get a job with ESPN and do this for a different team each week like Todd does the Taste of the Town segment on College Gameday. =)

  13. 13
    Mandi M. says:

    Wow! Quite the Roll Tide fashion! Though I did love the brown riding boots. Not surprised to see Alabama in the BCS game. But no way is this girl cheering for them. Uh uh. Can’t make me. lol Well, ok if they were playing Ohio State I would give a big Roll Tide. lol Here is to hoping Notre Dame can pull out a win in the BCS. :)

  14. 14
    April says:

    I have been eager anticipating this blog post! Hysterical, weird, and just flat out awesome all rolled into one. Way to go!!

  15. 15
    Adrienne says:

    This post is hysterical! Love it!

    New blog reader here; hope I’m allowed to keep reading. You see, I’m from Indiana… And Catholic… =)

  16. 16
    Luanne says:

    So glad I found you on Pinterest. This may be the best thing I’ve seen. As a fan of another SEC school and having been to most, I can so no one does it quite like we do, to include football and the things wear. Thanks for sharing. Hope you have someone there tomorrow, there’s sure to be some good outfits to see

  17. 17
    LinhC says:

    Love the post. Game day is a fashion show, isn’t it?

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