In my last post on Mom Jeans, I promised to show you that it can be done – you can be an older, or more “mature” Mom and not have to wear Mom Jeans. In fact, my aim was to show that someone who already admittedly wears dreadful Mom Jeans can be miraculously transformed simply by wearing the right cut of denim.
My Mom had agreed to be my subject for this before the first post was published, but I was afraid she would back out after seeing the graphic detail that I included in my project. However, when I saw her at a family lunch the day after it posted, she told me she was ready to go the next day.
My Dad, however, was not as impressed with my post. He didn’t find it funny at all, and just said that it proved the point that “women dress for other women, not for men.”
To which my Mom quickly shot back, “Of course they do!! If we dressed for men, we couldn’t go out in public!!”. To which Mammaw (my Grandmother) chimed in, “Too true!”
You really need to experience a meal with my family. The conversations we have. . . they are too joyous for words.
I explained to my Dad in my most analytical voice that actually that is NOT true. Women dress for themselves primarily. All women really just want to “feel good” about how they look. They do, however, secondarily dress for other women, tertiarily dress for their husband, and quaternarily dress for other men.
I didn’t use tertiarily and quaternarily in my original speech, but I do love those words, even if they are improper versions of tertiary and quaternary.
So we promised to meet at the research facility the next morning.
Then I got nervous.
What if I couldn’t pull this off?
What if she hopelessly had The Dreaded Long Butt and my theories were wrong?
What if it truly was not avoidable in some cases?
Oh, the anxiety was gripping.
But I was relieved, delighted, and a wee bit shocked at the outcome of our research. So, without further ado, here is my report:
Hypothesis: That the condition known as “Long Butt” and proven as simply a wardrobe mistake in previous works can also be replaced with much more flattering looks even for more mature Moms, and that proper dressage in appropriate jeans can be potentially life changing.
Research Laboratory: Riverchase Galleria.
Test Subject:
Subject C: Sara.
Aliases include: Mom, Grammama, Miss Sara.
Age: 57.
Height: 5’5″.
Size: 12-14.
Mom Status: 3 Kids – ages 29, 27, and 22; 2 Grandkids – ages 2, and 9 mos.
Subject C is a self-admitted Mom Jeans wearer. After reading The Researcher’s prior research, she admitted to committing all of the cited Mom-Jean crimes. This fact changes the research methods from trying to prove a point to prevent Mom Jeaneage to actually trying to reverse the current Mom Jean situation. Which can be woefully seen in the subject’s Natural Habitat: 
Testing Standards: As opposed to the prior research, we did not stay only in her current size of jeans, as we are trying to fix an issue here, not just prove a point. However,regardless of how bad The Researcher would have liked to have modified the rest of her clothing to match the new jeans, they were kept the same in the name of proper research standards. Fixing everything else will have to be another test for another day.
Testing Oversight: Provided by Ali,LLP. Yes, she lost her partner, Radford. However, she DID have some help from Elaine, our fitting room associate, who can be seen in some of the pictures as well.
Here is the research team (photographed by the above mentioned Elaine), which included Ali, LLP; The Researcher; and Subject C:
Our first and most productive stop in our research was Ann Taylor. This store ended up being a perfect fit for Subject C’s body phase.
An important factor of finding the right jean is to first recognize that us as women go through many body “phases” from the time we’re 10 years old until we die. I mean, NOTHING stays the same for long, does it?
So you must be willing to try jeans at different stores until you find the one that fits your current body phase the best. Most stores cater to a specific age group, which can help steer you in the right direction, but still may not be entirely right for you. For example:
Delia’s – Typical body phase market = 12-20 years old.
Express - Typical body phase market = 15-30 years old.
Gap - Typical body phase market = 20-35 years old.
New York & Company – Typical body phase market = 25-40 years old.
Ann Taylor – Typical body phase market = 30-50 years old.
Chico’s – Typical body phase market = 45-70 years old.
Sear’s (where all Mom Jeans in previous post were tried on) – Typical body phase market = 70-150 years old, or for anyone who just happened to time warp straight from the 1980′s.
Disclaimer: all above data is in The Researcher’s approximations, and is not information from the mentioned stores.
Back to the data. For comparison, here is the view of Subject C’s natural habitat again:And here is the first pair of jeans (size 10) that Subject C tried on at Ann Taylor (and please forgive the flash, but The Researcher couldn’t pull Subject C away from the mirror after changing her life):
YES. It’s true. Subject C DID, in fact, just lose 30 pounds and have a 50% butt shrinkage factor before your very eyes. The Researcher AND Subject C were completely floored.
Let’s point out the factors that contribute to this amazing transformation.
1. Length: This was discussed at length (no pun intended) in prior research, but this is a perfect example. Having jeans that are short give the effect of the worst, most unflattering pair of “skinny jeans” ever, because they bring all of the attention to the smallest part, ankles, giving the effect of a triangle:Subject C was insistent that the new jeans were too long, but even though they seem long by traditional standards, the results are undeniable. Jeans that almost come to the floor dramatically lengthen the leg.
2. Leg line: This goes hand in hand with length. Besides the length being too short, the cut of Subject C’s old jeans was “tapered”. This just heightens the triangle effect. Notice that her 2 year old Granddaughter understands the importance of length AND leg line better than Subject C:
Subject C’s new length and leg line, which is “boot cut” (MAYBE the length is a quarter of an inch too long, but it would be perfect if Subject C would wear ANY KIND OF HEEL AT ALL):
2. Pocketage: I will not dwell on this point because it was belabored quite thoroughly in prior research. If you don’t know what I am referring to, PLEASE go back and get a refresher, as this is the most pivotal point of all research done.
Previous butt:
New Butt:
The Researcher sincerely had NO IDEA that Subject C had such a non-Mom, curvy-and-not-flat-or-long butt under there. If this isn’t proof enough that it’s all in the pockets, then nothing is.
3. Modern cut and Detail: Notice the modern pocket stitching and the fading detail in the front. The Researcher seriously COULD NOT believe how skinny Subject C looks at this angle.
The Researcher’s husband, upon seeing this picture of his Mother-In-Law, said, “That looks like YOU, not your Mother!!”
Of which The Researcher is choosing to take the compliment that she transformed Subject C, rather than taking the insult that her husband told her that she looked like her Mother.
Final pictures of this pair, just to reiterate the point that there absolutely MUST be a bucket of 30 pounds of prior body weight sitting in the corner of that Ann Taylor dressing room:
Can you believe that butt gets free coffee at McDonalds?! She may start getting carded!
And a front view of a thoroughly shocked and excited Subject C, upon discovering the body she didn’t think she had:
First, done right:
Notice the flapped pocket, the still-tapered fit, and the modern wash.
The Researcher still felt that the above pair were too baggy (size 10), so she went and got Subject C a Size 8 (at which point Subject C fainted onto the floor). And although The Researcher felt that the fit was better, Subject C was quick to point out that it did, indeed, create a Muffin Top (lingo that Subject C obviously learned from The Researcher’s prior research):
So the Researcher agreed that concessions could be made for a looser fit, but only to avoid Muffin Tops.
Now, let’s look at the Trouser pant done wrong. This was at a different store (which will remain unnamed since we found nothing positive there, but we can just say it was an “Older Age Ranged Store”):
This trouser pant presents multiple problems:
1. No Shape/Too Baggy: The leg cut is more like a very poorly tailored pair of dress pants, and so they end up looking very unflattering.
2. Pocket: The flap pocket is preferred in most cases, because it draws attention away from any potentially saggy-looking lower-butt curvature. Also, if one’s shirt covers those tiny pocket entries, then it has major potential to just look like the Grandma Jean, as defined in prior research:
Here is another Trouser Pant done wrong, except in the opposite direction. These were tried on at a “Younger Age Range” store:
The wash and length were good, but the rear was too tight, which was just accentuated by, again, having no pocket flaps to detract attention from the fit.
After all of this research, the consensus was definitely that Ann Taylor was the ideal store for Subject C’s body type.
So now research has proven the Mom Jeans/Long Butt Theory both ways. Subject A and B, who didn’t wear Mom Jeans, showed that they can have a Long Butt by wearing Mom Jeans. Subject C, who has been wearing Mom Jeans for decades, has shown the immediate and dramatic improvements that come about by NOT wearing Mom Jeans.
And with that, I leave you with hot Subject C’s profile:Who knew she was such a hot Gramamma??
I am a 31 year old Mom of two kids in Birmingham, Alabama who uses naptime to work from home (as an accountant) and blog on three different sites. 
Wow! What an amazing transformation! I will be forwarding this to my mom for sure!
Of course I need to go jeans shopping with a friend and a camera. How cool!
You are a great researcher. I need to take you shopping with me. You only live what, an hour away?
That was as amazing as all the hype! Incredible! I definitely want you to help me shop for my next pair of jeans!
would you be willing to hire out your services? After the last post, I got all nervous about my jeans in my closet. . .WOW! Your mom looks awesome, so I expect you can do that for everyone, right?!
Thanks everyone! But the idea is that with all of the technical information given in this post and especially the first one, that anyone can shop for jeans and successfully buy a non-mom jean pair!
However, I'm willing to help anyone that agrees to have their butt plastered on my blog. >:)
I’m floored. You are a genius! I’m dragging my mom to Ann Taylor. I just honestly thought there was no hope.
This is hilarious Rachel! I can’t believe you posted pictures of your mom’s butt!! She’s definitely a trooper!!
Rachel!
We posted a short bit on the “Identifying Features of Mom Jeans”
(see http://www.sevenof.com/?p=899), but your study — and subsequent solutions! — kicks some Mom Jean Butt!!!
Amy
Love this. Nice work!
Amazing. Your Mom looks awesome in her new jeans. I’ll have to send this to my mom!
I’m glad you found your mother some non long butt jeans.
Love it! You look hot, Mil! (another alias, by the way
).
I have officially gone in to shorts until October. Maybe by then I can find “Over 50″ cool jeans. I cannot believe the difference. LLLYB
I am amazed!! I kept scrolling up and down, “no, that can’t be! but it is!!” Thanks for taking the time to complete the research:) I’m kinda excited that I actually need to go jean shopping soon:)
thank you so much for sharing this. I’m almost 42 and hate buying jeans- but BOTH of your posts were so helpful. Can’t wait to get some new ones now!! You guys are awesome. Thanks, thanks, thanks!
Rachel!
You need to make this into an eBook
and sell it on Ebay! WE all want to look skinnier than we really are; and there’s no crime in that right?! Hey, we need not look bigger in our jeans than we really are, thanks to you!
I so enjoyed your article, you are a great writer! I love the picture of your little girl, Ali standing next to grandmother and you point out Ali is the one with the best length for the most flattering fit! Boy, she sure learns fast, huh?!
I enjoyed y’all’s visit to our store and am glad to have made some new friends.
And guess what? The Ann Taylor full price jeans are STILL ON SALE for 39.00!!! That’s as of tonight, Wed. March 11,2009!!
Thanks for the free publicity!
God bless,
Elaine from Ann Taylor
This is awesome!!! I am always trying to talk my mom into letting me take her shopping. Your mom looks great in her new jeans!
I just found your blog today, and what a great post! First of all, I can’t believe your mom agreed to this (my mom would never!). But what a difference! You should offer your services to other “Mom Jean Wearers”! You could change the fashion world!
This is awesome. Mom doesn’t wear jeans, because she can never find a pair to fit her. I’m sending this post to her.
Stopping by from BigMama’s. What a cute Fashion Friday post! It looks like you had a lot of fun with your mom!
Your mom is a great sport and I loved seeing all the different jeans styles! Great research!
I found you through BigMama’s FF post and must say– this is research that would change the world if all the MomJean offenders would read it and heed the advice. Awesome post!! I would LOVE for you to shop for jeans with me. Your mom looks amazing in her new jeans.
I loved this post, and I am headed to AnnTaylor ASAP to get me some non mom jeans. Your mom was an absolute sport and came away with a great pair of jeans. I loved it!
I’m impressed! I have really enjoyed reading both of these posts. You made me take another look at the jeans in my closet. Although I did not have any long butt jeans in there, I did have some that were just not right.
Thanks!
LOL! This is hilarious! What a great idea. I can’t believe you got your mother to go along with it, but it worked! You made your point! Mommy jeans have got to be outlawed!
God bless the sweet woman who allowed all the befores and afters of her butt. You look AMAZING!!! Great post!
What can I say? Great study with beautiful results. You’re mom looked great. Did she buy them I hope?!
I loved your post about the mom jeans. I am guilty of wearing mom jeans for too many years to count. I’m 45 and a size 16P. I ordered the Ann Taylor jeans online. Loved them. My daughter was startled by how good they looked. So she took me shopping at the mall for more jeans. I found a pair at Old Navy. I am having to get them altered a bit since the back stuck out. But otherwise they fit good. I don’t understand why the waist band of so many jeans is so big? I’m not skinny, must be my hour glass figure! LOL!
So I want to ask you what other stores should I be looking at? I’m losing weight and will be in a size 14 in probably another month. So places like Lane Bryant are too big. I’m on the cusp of sizes. I had never shopped at Ann Taylor. It was a pleasant surprise..
Thanks again, you have transformed my life!
dude. i know this was awhile ago, but. what did your DAD say?
sincerely,
anonymous coward
I love these posts. So true. I am so glad that my 62 year old mother does not wear Mom or grandma pants. She actually shops with me at the buckle and looks great in them. I have a pant obsession and have committed to never wearing Mom pants.
That was awesome. Not only very thoroughly researched and informative, but laugh out loud funny!
JUST NOW READ THIS!! Loved it! Your mom's tooshie rocks!!! You've got some good genes!
Wow- I'm 26 and pregnant with my second baby and that gives me hope I can still be hot at 50 or 60 with those jeans. Great work!
WOW, you are an awesome writer and did a great job with your Mom. I am 54 and 5'1" and wear 8-10P. Have you even tried the Lee Riders at Wal-Mart as suggested by Stacey London of WHAT NOT TO WEAR??? Try it, they look like skinny jeans on me and they are only 20 some dollars. BUT that's not to say you did a great job. I LOVE IT!
My daughter sent me your links so I went to Ann Taylor today. They no longer make this style. : ( But I thought maybe I could get a pair on eBay? Would your mom mind sharing the info on her label?
Linda – I got my Mom to check, and here's what she came up with:
"On the size tag it says Modern Fit , Lindsay waist. On a small
inside tag at the side seam are these numbers on one side 227254 and on the
other side these numbers ID#8054C. "
Hope that helps! Good luck!!
The Ann Taylor Lindsay Waist Jeans! I bought these jeans 3 years ago, and was lucky enough to get another pair 2 years ago on sale! Unfortunately, they do not make these anymore and I would also love to get a few more pairs–size 2…I was googling to see where I could find some when I came across your blog–well done! If anyone knows of a warehouse somewhere that may have these—Would love to know! Thanks and good job! The ID #8054C cited above is the same as mine, but the other number is different (probably irrelevant)..
I am so impressed with your research and will definitely apply it. Loved your humorous approach to a really serious problem!
honestly fabulous! loved both posts!
could you show us how to not have mom butt when wearing shorts?? summer’s comin’!
Oh I SO wish I could figure that out – I hate shorts, because they all make me look like I have barrel thighs!! I really need to do some shorts research this summer and see if I can find a solution…
Good for her! Thank you for doing all this research. Wish you could come shopping with me. I have a closet full of jeans, but only one pair that I like the rear view in.
She looks younger, thinner, hipper and GREAT! Love her smile, too.
I am a MOM jeans wearer. sad but true. I am a 48 year old mother of three step mother of 4 and grandmother of 7 ( I know makes me feel old just reading it!!!) Both articles on Mom butt are very enlightening. In fact I may have to print them out and take them shopping with me so I get it right!!!
Thank you so much for tirelessly doing the research to save the world from the long butt!!!
I am really late reading this but thanks for both posts. Love your mom’s transformation. Very good info about pockets – I had no idea.
My problem is talls are too long and regular not long enough and I need a longer rise. Any thoughts about how/if/ it is ever acceptable to lengthen jeans. I lucked out in the 70s when I was young and it was cool to add ribbon or whatever.
Thanks again. I will now look at all slacks with new critical eyes.
Kathy
these two blogs were HILARIOUS but SO TRUE! great “research” and love that you showed both ages.
Your sense of humor makes me laugh outloud! And just as important, your information is most helpful!!!!! Thanks — you are delightful!
I wish my older relatives would read this! But alas…mom jeans it is… Your mom looked great, by the way.
Well, that was THOROUGHLY entertaining while at the same time providing me with hope for myself, which I had given up on a long time ago… Thank you!
So thankful for this and the previous research (Long Butt). Because of this my Mom Jeans are now at the local Good Will store. Found some jeans that fit me better at Old Navy. But plan to take a trip to Ann Taylor very soon.
That’s great – congratulations!!
For the record, I took my Aunt to Ann Taylor not too long ago, and their selection of non-mom jeans has waned considerably. I ended up taking her to Express, and they fit much better.
Love it. I have believed for a LONG time and refuse to wear the mom jeans. Great research. Need to post this post for all the other moms out there who need to read it and laugh. 45 year old me is ready also to get rid of my beloved cords which I have fortunately lost enough weight to have them hanging off of me. Baggy pants…..NO!!!!
I LOL, being a Grandma that wears Mom jeans on a daily basis… looking forward to my next trip to Ann Taylor! Maybe I can lose that last 15 pounds in their changing room, too!
Best of luck!! Although for the record, the last time I took someone (my Aunt-In-Law) to Ann Taylor, a lot of their jeans weren’t as flattering as the ones pictured here. I ended up helping her get jeans at Limited and Express, and they looked great on her!
Wow. Just wow. Very insightful and informative to someone who had no clue. And you did all that research with a toddler in tow!
I’m also curious what your dad thought about it. I love both articles and your 100 random things post.
He just rolled his eyes. He doesn’t like to let onto his emotions very often, though!
I stumbled upon your first experiment and the link to the sequel and loved reading them both!! You inspired me! Being a mom-jean wearing AARP card holder for years, I had settled into Levi 550 complacency. Reading your blog prompted me to get in the car, drive to the local Levi outlet store and let the store clerk determine my body shape (demi curvy) and put me into some non-mom jean styles. Love it! Tell your mom that this over-60 mom says she’s lookin’ hip and hot now.
Wow. I know I have been wearing “mom jeans” but at age 53 I really didn’t care. But, now that I have seen the transformation in your mom’s, er, derriere, I am rushing out to buy a new pair of jeans. I see that this blog is 3 years old, but I trust I will still be able to find a trendy new pair somewhere, if not at Ann Taylor.
Now if you could just just figure out the solution to buying jeans for women 5’3″ tall, where Misses length jeans are 1-2 inches too long, but Petite jeans are are 1-2 inches too short. It’s like they only make pants for women 5’2″ and under, or 5’4″ and over. Ugh.
Thanks for a fun read.
Great!
No, Ann Taylor has unfortunately gone off the Mom Jeans Deep End since this post. I would recommend trying the short length at Express, in either the Stella or Eva brands.
Let me know how it goes!
Your mom and Grandma are hilarious and totally right!
Thanks! It was a lot of fun.
Rachel, At 62 I never understood exactly what you described in these two excellent articles. I recently bought a pair of jeans that I felt good in. After reading your articles, I looked at my backside and saw my pockets did curve under as recommended. The length thing is a problem for me at 5’3″ the hems are too short (petite) or too long (regular). I may have to commit to having even my everyday jeans hemmed to the appropriate length. My other problem is my apple belly.
If you’ve done research of widening waists, please let me know. If not, a possible subject for research. Almost everyone gets to this stage of a wider waist.
Barbara
Yes, hemming is the key – I get all of my jeans hemmed, and it’s very much worth it.
As far as the waist, many jeans seem to be made for bigger waists now – in fact, on my latest jean article (http://www.graspingforobjectivity.com/2012/07/gap.html), most people complained that the waists were all TOO big.
The biggest-waisted jean I’ve come across are William Rasts, if that helps any.
Rachel,
Love your post. I am 45 years old. I just lost 20 lbs. back to size 6.
I have been struggling to find jeans that fit my new size. I finally tried one of the younger age stores where my daughter shops. Those jeans fit so differently. After reading your blog I understand why and see how they make my behind look better. I have a very flat but, but the pocket placement gives me a little bit of shape. I will remember this and not just get lucky next time. Thanks
Excellent! And congrats on the weight loss!!
AWESOME article & “research”! I’m going to go through my clothes today & see how much I need to get rid of! Thank you for the inspiration!
Thanks to you AND YOUR AWESOME MOM! I recently went shopping with my mother and was there when she discovered Not Your Daughters Jean. She was sashaying around and feeling GREAT about herself in minutes. Life is too short to wear unflattering clothes
Thanks so much! I haven’t tried those yet, but I’ve heard good things.
I just stumbled across this in Pinterest. So informative yet funny. I hope and can get my Mom…wears her jeans too high and too tight, and my m-i-l…wears elastic waist jeans, to do this. Thanks for your research!
WOW! The results are astounding! How many people would skip liposuction if they only knew!
Loved both articles. Lots of great tips, although as an overweight grandmother, I don’t know how much I’ll be able to accomplish. Can’t seem to find anything between grandma jeans and muffin tops. Looks like I need to check out Chico’s and Ann Taylor.
I’m not even sure how I stumbled upon this website, but I am guilty as charged and will be shopping immediately with my newfound enlightenment! I honestly did not know about the pocket effect, but totally agree now that I see what it does – especially since you featured the exact same Lee jeans I currently have in my closet. Thank you also for proving an older mom can also wear flattering jeans, as I am no spring chicken anymore.
You’re welcome! Best of luck in shopping!
I just stumbled across this on Pinterest as well and wanted to thank you for your research to enlighten the rest of us. I ended up switching from mom jeans, but not really knowing why and so it helps to understand the physics behind this and to identify how to not end up with them.
Do you have any insight on ‘baggy butt’ that happens when wearing pants, sometimes jeans?
You’ve just got to find a brand that doesn’t stretch out through the day, and if you have a small butt, find a jean that’s made for a small butt!
Thank you for your research and humor on a lesson very much needed for all age groups! Now I need to return the two pairs I bought in error.
Thank you so VERY MUCH for all the great information on how jeans are SUPPOSED to fit!!!!!! I, too, am a grandmother, who would like to look as young as I feel! Thank ygoodness you are listening to us young “older” women! We are totally forgotten about and ignored by most stores!
Thank you so much!
You’re so welcome! I’m glad it helped.
Love your humorous writing, and very well done illustrations! I’m a convert!
Actually, at 54, never dressed THAT badly, but now understand what makes a difference. Thank you! If my 76 yr old mother really cared, I would know how to help!
What about NYDJ? (Not Your Daughter’s Jeans)? From Nordstroms, Macys, etc.
I have not tried these myself, but from what I’ve heard, they have some work to do to get the pocket placement right. However, they’re going to be different on every body, so it’s worth a look to see how the pockets fall on you.
I had to post a response to this one. I read all of your other “butt blogs” and I seriously laughed my butt off at the Sears age range! I like to think of myself as a very young looking/acting 40 something who is completely unwilling to let my butt become long! Please pass along to your mom that she looks incredible out of the Lee’s. She transformed entirely and all I can say is WOW and good for her!
I have three adult daughters, two of whom are plus sized and it was really refreshing and awesome you did not leave them out. Big butts DO lie when they are in the wrong jeans!
Thanks for the awesome advice. I had no idea about the space between pockets and just how much of the view I am missing when trying on jeans. I hope to provide my derriere with the most flattering jeans from now on.
Thanks so much! I’m so glad it was helpful. Best of luck shopping!!
I am 55 and have the Diva boot cut from Old Navy. I also have a couple of pairs of Miss Me in bootcut and skinny with back flap pockets. There is such a major difference. I only wear the Old Navy at home lol! I have to fight my 18 year old for my Miss Me skinny jeans. It is all in the back pockets and cut. I also believe they look better with a tall heel! I wouldn’t go to the mailbox in skinny jeans from Old Navy! I don’t have skinny jeans from Old Navy, but if I did…
OMG!!! This was the cutest, funniest, most informative fashion advice blog I’ve ever read!!!! Thank you so much! Please address the wide butt syndrome in your next blog!
Still howling!
Glenda Barnett
You are a delight! I’m a 53 year mother and soon to be grandmother. I found your research very helpful even though my BFF has kept me from wearing mom jeans for years. I will never forget when she introduced me to a lower cut pair of Calvin Kleins. It took 10 years off my life and I threw away my Chic jeans forever!! Keep up the good work!
Thank you so much!! Have a great New Year’s!!
Your post-the original, and this one that lead from Jeans for 50+, have been so entertaining! Thanks for all the research-you have saved me countless depressing hours of searching for some new jeans. HA! I am 50 this year, 6 ft tall and size 12. Most everything I put on for jeans gives me the long mom butt. I hate it! My fave jeans are Levi’s and they have holes thru them. Before looking for patches I think I will head out tomorrow and hunt some new ones. Now I know where to start looking and where to avoid. I hope my butt will look as good as your moms! Thanks again, and also thanks for the giggles! (my husband had to look over my shoulder to see what was making me laugh. Long zippers, 3rd cheek, etc.)
You’re welcome! And best of luck shopping!!
Hello. I found your blog via Pinterest THREE HOURS AGO and I was completely suckered in. Well-written and humorous, so a big thank you!
I’m almost 47 (sob) and hate shopping for clothes, particularly jeans. At 59 inches (it sounds so much taller than 4’11′, doesn’t it?) and about 105 pounds, I still have a bit of a C-section pooch even 8 years later. =/ I had not bought jeans in YEARS because I hate the process… the crying and sobbing in the dressing room got to be more than I or my 20-year-old daughter could bear. Two days ago, we went to a local consignment shop, where I found a couple of pairs of– dare I confess?– Old Navy jeans. One is the Diva (size 3) and the other is the Sweetheart (size 2). Who comes up with these names? Any way, they fit great , and both pairs got the squeal of approval from my daughter. “Look at Momma, rockin” the skinny jeans!” She’s a good one for my ego, that one is. Now that I’ve read through these posts and comments, I’m rethinking those two pairs of jeans. Ouch. I think I may head to Express?
They do work on some people, so maybe you’re one of those people!! Feel free to send me a picture if you want – I’ll be glad to help if I can and send you in the right direction.
Just had this forwarded to my by my 27 yo daughter, do you think she is trying to tell my something???!!!
Ha! I don’t know…best of luck finding out!
I’ horrified to find that I’ve been wearing mom jeans for years ( Old Navy Sweeheart) now that I know I have to rectify the situation ASAP
Thank you for opening my eyes
This made me laugh. I’m 54 with 3 grown daughters who constantly keep an eye out for a mom butt appearing. I appreciate it. I have found that for my body type ( short waist, long legs) that women’s jeans just are a huge NO since most of them seem to be made to ride just below my bra… I have found that Wallflower brand curvy juniors fit amazing and are actually made long enough. The other bonus…$29 at Shopko.
Love your blogs they are so helpful, just found them today. I am 62 and 4’10″ and 120 pounds. Big waist and tummy, skinny legs. I should only weigh 95 or 100 at my height. Suggestions? Also, I recently heard of some Diane Gilman jeans, DG2 I think, as perfect for baby boomers. Are any of them flattering and non-mom? Thanks.
I haven’t tried Diane Gilman. I would try William Rast, though – they keep legs skinny while giving extra room in the tummy.
On my way from size 24 to 16. Already lost 34#.
My goal is size 14 jeans. Currently in Grandma jean.
Thanks for the hints.
Congratulations on the weight loss! That’s awesome.
wow. As a dedicated Mom-jeans wearer, I was very skeptical. I thought your mom looked fit and comfy in her own jeans. While I didn’t think she looked thinner, necessarily in the new jeans, since the originals had a slightly baggy fit, absolutely she has the butt of a 20-something in the jeans you got her. I will certainly be rethinking my stance on pockets and taking your advice on length to heart. Still need pants that fasten around the waist so they don’t feel like they’re falling off, but thanks for the convincing!
How extremely informative AND hilarious! In my casual observations when out and around , it’s scary how MANY women, and not just gals over 40, wear hideous, unflattering jeans. Including the dreaded mom jeans. I’m 58 and have never worn tapered, high waisted jeans. Except Brittanias back in the 80s. But that was the style!!
I’m 66 and thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!
You’re welcome!! Enjoy shopping!
I have the problem of jeans cutting me in two in the front crotch area. I don’t like the “split-tail” look, but I don’t know what causes it in order to avoid specific cuts of jeans. What causes this?
Thanks!
Eileen
You probably need a jean with more room in the crotch (perhaps a higher rise), a different fabric (less spandex and more weight) or a size bigger. Hope that helps!
What a great article! I really enjoyed the photos. What a difference! I recently discovered (inexpensive!!!) jeans at Charlotte Russe. They fit me much better than other more expensive jeans.
Thanks so much for all your hard work ( sorry about those achy legs-Epsom salt bath-or circulation stockings help hurting feet and legs)/I appreciate the help. Now if someone would do this for the guys out there! (or is there a blog I missed).
Sears 70 -150, lol so true
thanks for all this research, now jeans make sense to me.
I will make a short list for when I buy my next jeans.
Thank you!!! I am just reading your blog for the first time. I learned of it through a link on Pinterest and it has replaced man repeller as my favorite style blog. You put the jeans in jeanious! (misspelling intended). Please keep up your very important research. You are making the world a more beautiful place. With regard to your review of Gap jeans, I was glad to learn that I am not the only person who looks horrible in most if not all Gap jeans. One question, have you ever tried the gap always skinny cords? Unlike gap jeans, the cords are crazy flattering on me-to the point that I have had several women complement me on my butt and gone straight to the gap where they purchased these magic cords for themselves. Thanks again!
I agree – they have great cords!
Your research was very interesting and I give so much credit to your test subject. I am in my fifties, and I don’t think I would have had the guts to do this as your mom did. (although she looks wonderful). She has the same body shape as I do, so this information is going to help immensely! Thank you to both you and your mom! I loved the humor you put in this also. Very good blog.
My daughter has told me to read this article, and that I wear the classic mom jeans. She insisted that I go to the Buckle and try on their jeans. After trying on Miss Me, and Rock and Republic jeans. I was amazed. I had to bite the bullet and pay $158.00 for the Rock and Republic, but they look great! Well worth every penny. No more mom butt for me!